BREAKING: The Clintons’ Guest House Just Burned To The Ground

The 911 dispatcher in Westchester County, New York had a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to talk to former President Bill Clinton…as he called to report that his guest home was on fire:

” He said it had started about 15 minutes ago, which I thought was odd, but he said during that time the Secret Service was trying to put the fire out with extingyuishers and a hose. We got trucks there in seven minutes and the entire Chappaqua residence wqas engulfed in flames.”

Experts say there’s no way an electrical fire, which is what Clinton told the operator it must be, could have destroyed that building that quickly. An arson investigation is underway. As for the Clintons, Sherrif Lyle Sanderson says they’re cooperating but that there’s something…off…about them:

“They just sat on the porch, rocking away and drinking lemonade. Their lawyer was in the house watching reruns of McGyver. They’re pleasant enough. We’re keeping the press away for them until we figure out what’s happening.”

That tactic seems to be working, as not a single major newsoutlet is leading or even bothering to cover this story. Who knows what he could be covering up with that fire? Still, nobody seems to care. maybe if the arson investigator can point a finger at him that will change.

Hilary Clinton is present but hasn’t made contact with anyone. She was the one who insisted they buy the Chappaqua property so Chelsea and her family would have a place to stay when they were in town. Now it looks like they’ll get to do a custom rebuild.