BREAKING: Armed ‘ANTIFA’ Terrorist Group Takes Mar-A-Lago

Donald Trump’s exquisite Palm Beach resort home, Mar-a-Lago, has been quietly infiltrated and seized by armed ANTIFAs, according to our source inside the building. After some digging, the phones at the club have been set to go directly to voicemail and there does seem to be a small command station of plain-clothed agents under a canopy out front.

Our Correspondent on the scene, Skip Tetheluda, says the situation is tense but “well under control”:

“There are a dozen or so masked men wearing military gear. They have American flag patches sewn on upside down to indicate a nation in distress and they have ‘No Fascism’ patches under those. They are serious men and women with a serious mission who are apparently negotiating with the FBI at this moment.”

Skip’s source at the FBI tells us that while there is no official “investigation,” a group of armed intruders at Mar-a-Lago is certainly not something that they’ll be able to keep quiet for long:

“It looks like these guys have snipers set up to patrol a perimeter of several miles. We’re urging anyone in the area to stay clear. Don’t come down here or you’ll more than likely be mistaken for someone you’re not and get yourself shot.”

The terrorists are demanding that Trump resign or they will burn the property to the ground, and “Trump Tower will be next.”